I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
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I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
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Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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