college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
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