No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
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