Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard