you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Randomize
