a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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