ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
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