It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
Randomize
