Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
Farmville is her only friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
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