sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
Randomize
