it's too hot outside to masturbate.
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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