He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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