Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
Randomize
