never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
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I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
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Also, beer. Big fan.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
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