My mom just drunkenly told me i was conceived in the back of a car, at a Bon Jovi concert.
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
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