I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
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