the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
It's never too late to be topless.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
Randomize
