we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
high people should be assigned attendants
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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