Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
Floor bacon is actually really good
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
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