is your mom at the bar?
you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That reminds me...we need to get swords
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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