Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
I have post one night stand depression
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