spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
