How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just high enough for therapy.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
I'm gonna invite every single tinder date I've had to my birthday. Let them fight, battle Royale style. The winner gets to fuck me. \n\nBest. Birthday. Ever
Randomize