I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Randomize