I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
I will be naked everywhere
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
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