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sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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