Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
Randomize