she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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