come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
Slut skills are useful in every country.
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
Randomize
