end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize
