Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
Randomize