Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
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