wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
should my penis look like a turkey
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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