Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(303): View more from Colorado

Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)

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(703): View more from Virginia

i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?

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(425): View more from Washington

I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.

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(765): View more from Indiana

She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?

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27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst
Read it at the TFLN blog
(609): View more from New Jersey

I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.

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(253): View more from Washington

Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.

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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.

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(203): View more from Connecticut

No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.

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(419): View more from Ohio

Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.

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