Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
try lime green
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
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just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
These 17 Delivery Dudes Suck At Their Jobs But Are Winning At Life
being pregnant is like rehab
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?