69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
