Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
We need to get me chipped asap
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
Randomize