Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
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