My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Randomize
