There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
My butt remains clenched, sir.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
Randomize
