it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Randomize
