its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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