I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
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