NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
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