On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
Randomize
