you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
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