Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
Randomize
