Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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