He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
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