it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
They are going to name an STD after you.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Randomize
