your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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