windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
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