i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
Randomize
