On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
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