I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
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